Funny Kids SMS Jokes

Short and funny SMS Jokes for Kids. Why should adults have all the fun!

A baby monkey asked

A baby monkey asked his mother, why are we so ugly? Mother said: Thank God we look like this you should see the person reading this SMS!

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A baby monkey asked

A baby monkey asked his mother, Why are we so ugly? Mother said: Do not complain son, We look far better than the one reading this SMS!

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A boy goes to

A boy goes to a cabaret dance bar. His mom is angry and asks: Did you see anything you should not have seen there. Son: Ya I saw Dad there.

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A kid calls his

A kid calls his maths teachers house everyday. Teachers wife: I have told you 100 times that my husband is dead. Why do you call. Kid: Feels good to hear it!

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A kid on his

A kid on his way home with his mom saw a couple kissing on the road, he suddenly shouted and said look mom look, that boy and girl are fighting for a chewing gum.

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A kid was beaten

A kid was beaten by his mom. Dad came and asked to kid- What happened son? Kid said- I cannot adjust with your wife anymore, I want my own.

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A man knocks at

A man knocks at the door. A 10 years old boy comes with cigarette in one hand and beer in other. Man: Is daddy at home? Boy: Look at me? What do you think?

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Aadmi apne bachay se

Aadmi apne bachay se: beta sharaab mat peena, warna yeh jo do aadmi ja rahe hain tumhain chaar nazar aayenge. Bacha: magar papa wo to ek aadmi hai.

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Boy Mom I got

Boy: Mom I got only one answer wrong out of 30. Mom: Good, so your score must be 29. Boy: No mom, I couldn’t answer the remaining 29 at all.

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Boy walks in to

Boy walks in to a strip club and see’s mom and gets caught Mom: Did you see anything you weren’t supposed to see? Boy: Yeah, dad.

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Buntu Would you punish

Buntu: Would you punish me for some thing I did not do? Teacher: No, of course not. Buntu: good, I didn’t do my homework.

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Cute Arguement Ek Baccha

Cute Arguement! Ek Baccha Rote Huye Apni Maa Se: Papa Ne Mujhe Kiss Nahi Kiya. Maa: Beta Aap Ne ABC Nahi Sunaai Hogi? Beta: To Ap Kon Sa Roz ABC Sunati Hain

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Dad Beta is baar

Dad: Beta is baar mein tujhe bike zarur dilaonga. Exam mein paas hue to honda 70 collage jaane ke liye aur fail hue to rajdoot dudh bechne ke liye.

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Do bhai exam hall

Do bhai exam hall mein. Teacher: Tum dono ne apne father ka naam different kyun likha? Ek bhai: Aap phir bolti ke humne copy ki hai. hamaare paas dimaagh hai.

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Ek nursery class ka

Ek nursery class ka baccha: mam main aapko kaisa lagta hu? Madam: oh,very sweet.. baccha apne dost se: Dekha, maine kaha tha na line maarti hai.

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Father How are your

Father: How are your grades? Son: Under water. Father: What! Son: Below C level.

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Girl Mummy my tummy

Girl: Mummy, my tummy is aching. Mom: That’s because you haven’t eaten anything. Your tummy must be empty. Girl: Now I know why you had a headache last night.

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Height of good luck

Height of good luck. Teacher: hey you, stand up and tell me two pronouns . Student: who, me? Teacher: very good sit down.

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Height Of Laziness Son

Height Of Laziness. Son: Dad Ek Glass Pani Do. Dad: Khud Lo. Son: Do na. Dad: Agar Fir Maanga To Thappad Dunga. Son: Jab Thappad Marne Aao To Pani Leke Aana.

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Lady Chantu what does

Lady: Chantu, what does your father do? My father’s dead, Ma’am. Lady: I am sorry. What did he do before he died? Chantu: He went blue and collapsed.

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Mam aaj tum late

Mam: aaj tum late kyun aaye? Student : miss, aap meri itni fikar mat kiya karo, dost shak karte hain.

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Mam Correct the sentence

Mam : Correct the sentence, A bull and a cow is grazing. Student : A cow and a bull is grazing. Mam : How? Student : Ladies First.

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Mam ko susu ke

Mam ko susu ke naam se nafrat thi. Mam ne kaha Jab susu aye bolo- Aap aya hai. Ek student ko potty aayi. Mam Aap aya hai? Student: Nahi Aap ka baap aya hai

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Mam Oxygen is must

Mam: Oxygen is must for Breathing. It was discovered in 1773. Santa: Thank God I was born after that . Pehla Paida hota to mar hi jata .

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Maths Teacher If you

Maths Teacher: If you have 8 apples and you need to distribute it among 6 people how will you do it? Pappu: Simple mam, I will make a milkshake and distribute.

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Mom Golu do you

Mom: Golu, do you like to go to school? Golu: I love to go to school and to come back too. It is the in-between part that I hate!

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Mom Pray before you

Mom: Pray before you begin eating. Son: No, not today. Grandma has cooked food today, and she knows how to cook.

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Mother Mrs Jokes next

Mother: Mrs. Jokes next door has a new baby. Daughter: What will she do with her old one?

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Mother You prayed for

Mother: You prayed for grandma, grandpa, and Aunt Sue. Why did you not pray for Uncle John too? Daughter: I did not want to ask for too much.

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Pappu My grandpa knew

Pappu: My grandpa knew the exact time of his death in advance! Gappu: How did he know all that? Pappu: A Judge told him

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Parent I would like

Parent: I would like a day without punishing you. Little Mike: You have my full permission!

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Principal School ka time

Principal: School ka time 8 baje ka tha or tum 9:30 baje aa rahe ho? Student: Aap hamara intezaar mat kiya karo, school laga diya karo.

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Private school ke bacche

Private school ke bacche zoo mein: Hey Look. Monkey is sleeping, do not disturb Govt. school ke bacche: Oye. Dekh tera pyo so raha hai. Chal pathar maarey.

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Ramu Mere papa bahut

Ramu: Mere papa bahut darpok hain. Pappu: Why? Ramu: Jab bhi road cross karte hain, meri ungli pakad lete hain aur kehte chhodna mat.

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Sir Name the animal

Sir: Name the animal which live in water & land. Boy: Frog. Sir :Now name such 4 animals. Boy:Frog’s mother, Frog’s father, Frog’s sister

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Sir to Student Jo

Sir to Student: Jo cheez tumhe tang yaa pareshan kare usse apne paas bhi na bhatakne do. Student: Chal fir bahar nikal.

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Son Dad what is

Son: Dad, what is an idiot? Dad: An idiot is who tries to explain his ideas in a strange way such that another person can’t understand him.

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Son Have you ever

Son: Have you ever been to Egypt. Dad: No Son, Why? Son: Then how did you manage to get such a scary Mummy?

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Student school mein gadha

Student school mein gadha leke aaya. Teacher: ye gadha kyun laaye ho? Student: teacher aap hi to kehti hain ke maine bade bade gadho ko insaan banaya hai.

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Teacher Bataao Aurangzeb alamgir

Teacher: Bataao Aurangzeb alamgir ne kahan se kahan tak hukumat ki? Student: page number 19 se 25 tak.

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Teacher bataao cold drink

Teacher: bataao cold drink nuksaan deti hai ya faida? Student: agar koi pila de to faida, agar pilani pad jaaye to nuksaan.

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Teacher Because of Gandhiji

Teacher :Because of Gandhiji’s hard work what do we get on 15th August. Student: A HOLIDAY

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Teacher Behind every successful

Teacher: Behind every successful man there is a woman. What do we learn from this? Student: we should stop wasting time in studies and find a woman.

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TEACHER Can anybody give

TEACHER : Can anybody give an example of coincidence? Pappu : Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time.

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Teacher Can anyone give

Teacher: Can anyone give me an example of Coincidence? Johnny: Sir, my mother and father got married on the same day same time.

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Teacher Did your father

Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework? Student: No, he did it all by himself.

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Teacher Draw A Diagaram

Teacher: Draw A Diagaram Of Bacteria. Kid: Here It Is Sir. Teacher: Where? You Havent Drawn Anything Kid: Sir, Can you See Bacteria Without Microscope?

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Teacher Give an example

Teacher: Give an example of how heat expands things and cold contracts them. Pappu: Well, the days are longer in summer and shorter in winter.

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Teacher How old is

Teacher: How old is your father? Jhonny: As old as I am. Teacher: How is it possible? Jhonny: He became father after I was born.

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Teacher I wish you

Teacher: I wish you would pay a little attention! Student: I am paying as little as I can sir!

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Teacher Kabir ka doha

Teacher: Kabir ka doha sunao. Student: kabira kaiso kaiso, doha diyo banaaye, khud toh upar khisak liyo, humko gayo fasaaye.

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Teacher Main teri jaan

Teacher: Main teri jaan nikaal dungi, iska english translation kya hoga. Student: English gayi bhaad mein, tu haath to laga ke dikha.

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Teacher Now children if

Teacher: Now children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him,what virtue would I be showing? Student: Brotherly love

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Teacher point s ruler

Teacher point’s ruler at me. Teacher: At the end of this ruler is an idiot! Me: Which end do you mean?

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Teacher Students we should

Teacher: Students, we should treat poor people with sympathy and love. Golu stood up and said: Oh, now, I understand why my father hugs our maid everyday.

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Teacher Sunny is a

Teacher: Sunny is a bright boy, but he spends too much time thinking about girls. Mother: Tell me if you find a solution. His dad has the same problem.

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Teacher Tell me the

Teacher: Tell me the names of all planets. Student: venus earth mars. Teacher: Aur sunao. Student: Bilkul theek thak aap sunao.

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Teacher tenses ki koi

Teacher: tenses ki koi misaal dein. Jaise, main khoobsurat thi, khoobsurat hu aur khoobsurat rahungi. Baccha: aapko wehem tha, wehem hai aur wehem rahega.

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Teacher The people of

Teacher: The people of turkey are called Turks, now tell me what are the people of Germany called? Student: They are called Germs.

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Teacher There is no

Teacher: There is no difficulty in the world that we cannot overcome. Pupil: Have you ever tried squeezing the toothpaste back into the tube, Sir?

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Teacher to boy ek

Teacher to boy: ek taraf paisa hai ek taraf dimaag. Kya loge? Boy: paisa. Teacher: agar mein hoti to dimaag leti. Boy: jiske paas jo nahi hoga wo wahi lega na.

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Teacher Tomorrow there will

Teacher :Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun. Everyone must attend it. Raju: I wont come, my mother will not allow me to go so far

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Teacher Translate into English

Teacher: Translate into English – Mere sir de baal, udd gaye hawa de naal. Student: Hair of your Tind, have gone with the Wind.

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Teacher What happened in

Teacher :What happened in 1809? Student: Abraham Lincoln was born. Teacher: What happened in 1819? Student: Abraham Lincoln was ten years old.

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Teacher What is the

Teacher: What is the chemical formula for water? Pappu : Hijklmno. Teacher : What are you talking about? Pappu : Yesterday you said it is H 2 O.

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Teacher What was your

Teacher: What was your mother before she was married? Student (confused): Sir, I didn’t have a mother before she was married.

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Teacher Whoever answers my

Teacher: Whoever answers my question can go home. Pappu throws his bag out of the window. Teacher: Who threw that bag. Pappu: I did, and now I can go right?

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Teacher Why are you

Teacher: Why are you late? Kid: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. Teacher: Were you helping him look for it? Kid: No, I was standing on it.

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Teacher you should aim

Teacher- you should aim for 90% marks. Student-I will get 100% marks. Teacher- what… Why are you kidding? Student- who started?

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