Funny Doctor SMS Jokes
Funniest Doctor Jokes SMS. One Doctor Joke a day, will surely keep all sadness away!
Boyfriend:Kash Mera Accident Hota Main Tumhaare Ward Main Admit Hota, Tum Khidmat Karti Aur Main Theek Ho Jata. Nurse:Main Delivery Ward Mein Kaam Karti Hoon.
Definition of a Doctor: The dashing, handsom guy wearing white coat, holding your hand looking into your eyes and still wants your pulse to be normal.
Doctor: Aapka Weight Kitna Hai? Santa: Opticals Ke Saath 75 kg. Doctor: Aur Chasme Ke Bina? Santa: Wo Mujhe Dikhta Hi Nahi.
Doctor: Agar ek ghante pehle le aate toh hum isse bacha lete. Patients Friend: Abbe aadhe ghante pehle toh accident hua hai.
Doctor:I have a Good and Bad News. Patient:Whats The Bad News? Doctor:Your Symptoms Show That You Are Gay. Patient:And Good News? Doctor:I Think You Are Cute.
Doctor: Madam, your husband needs rest, I am giving some sleeping pills. Wife: Doctor, when should I give pills to him? Doctor: Those pills are for you.
Doctor Mareez Se: Agar Tum Meri Dua Se Theek Ho Gaye To Mujhe Kya Enaam Doge? Mareez: Main Kabare Khodta Hoon. Aapki Kabar Free Mein Khod Dunga.
Doctor: Motaape ka sirf ek hi illaaj hai ke tum sirf ek hi roti khaaya karo. Patient: Doctor sahib ye ek roti khaane se pehle khaani hai ya baad mein.
Doctor Ne 1 Pagal Se Poocha: Tum Chhat Se Kyun Latak Rahe Ho? Pagal: Main Ek Bulb Hoon. Doctor: Tum Jal Kyun Nahi Rahe? Pagal: Bewakoof Light Gayi Huyi Hai.
Doctor ne khansi ke mareez ko motion lagne ki dawa de di. Compounder: aapne motion ki dawaai kyun di? Doctor: ab wo khansane se pehle 100 dafa sochega.
Doctor Ne Khansi Ke Mareez Ko Motion Lagane Ki Dawa De Di. Compounder: Aap Ne Motion Ki Dawai Kyun Di? Doctor: Ab Wo Khansne Se Pehle 100 Dafa Sochega.
Doctor to patient: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you are not a hypochondriac.
Doctor To Patient : You Will Die Within 2 Hours. Do You Want To See Any One Before You Die? Patient : Yes, A Good Doctor
Doctor:Tum Pagal Kaise Huye? Pagal:Maine ek Bewa Se Shaadi Ki, Uski Jawan Beti Se Mere Baap Ne Shaadi Kar Li. Meri Wo Beti Meri Maa Ban Gayi unke Ghar Beti Huyi
Doctor: woh mareez ab kis baat par jhagad raha tha? Nurse: iss baat par ke dawaa khatam hone se pehle hi wo kyun sehat mand ho gaya.
Doctor:You need new glasses. Patient: How do you know? I havnt told you what is wrong with me. Doctor: I could tell as soon as you walked in through the window.
Doctors After Operation and Students After Exams Have The Same Thing To Say – We Tried Our Best. Right Now We Cant Say Anything. Please Pray.
Ek Doctor Ki Nurse Se Hi Shaadi Ho Gayi. Dost Ne Doctor Se Poocha: Life Kaisi Chal Rahi Hai? Doctor: Yar Kya Kahoon, Jab Tak Sister Na Kaho Sunti Hi Nahi Hai
Girl Doctor Se: Meri Skin Bahut Soft, Mulayam, Sensitive Hai Aur Rang Bahut Gora Hai. Sone Se Pehle Kya Laga Ke Soya Karoon? Doctor: KUNDI
Lady patient: Please call my husband in. Doctor: Trust me I am a gentleman. The lady: No its not that, your nurse is alone and my husband is not a gentleman.
Man: Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake. Doctor: Next time, take off the candles.
Man: Koi Lambi Umar Ka Tariqa Bataiye. Doctor: Shaadi Karlo. Man: Kya Isse Umar Lambi Ho Jaayegi. Doctor: Nahi, Ye Shauk Khatam Ho Jaayega.
Mareez: Main ek Month Se Roz Rs50 Ki Dawa Le Raha Hoon Par Koi Faida Nahi Hua. Doctor: Koi Baat Nahi, Kal Se Main Tumhe Rs40 Ki Dawa Dunga, Rs.10 Ka Faida Hoga
Mareez Ne Achanak Aankhen Kholte Huye Kaha: Doctor Sahab Kya Mera Operation Kamayab Raha? Sabr Se Kaam Lo Beta. Main Doctor Nahi FARISHTA Hoon.
Nurse Investigating A Patient With Head Injury. Nurse: Name? Patient: Jhonny. Nurse: Age? Patient: 39. Nurse: Married. Patient: No No , Its A Car Accident.
Nurse: Mubarak Ho Beta Hua Hai. Kya Naam Socha Hai? Baap: Aap Itni Beautiful Hai, Aap Hi Koi Naam Bata Dein? Nurse: Iska Naam Begairat Ka Baccha Rakh Dein
Operation Se Pehle Doctor Ne Phoolon Ka Haar Mangwaya, MAREEZ: Ye Kis Liye? Doctor: Mera 1st Opertion Hai Agar Kamyaab Hua To Mere Liye Warna Tumhare Liye
Patient – Doctor, doctor. Every time I drink a cup of tea, I get a pain in my eye.
Doctor – Take the spoon out of the cup.
Patient – Doctor doctor! I feel like a dog.
Doctor – How long have you felt like this?
Patient – Since I was a puppy.
Patient – Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking I am a dog.
Doctor – Take a seat.
Patient – I can’t, I am not allowed on the furniture.
Patient – Doctor, doctor! My son has swallowed my pen, what should I do?
Doctor – Use a pencil till I get there.
Patient: Doctor, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Doctor: Take these pills, I don’t know what they’re for .
Patient: It Must Be Tough Spending All Day With Your Hands In Someones Mouth. Dentist: I Just Think Of It As Having My Hands In Their Wallet.
Patient: it must be tough spending all day with your hands in someone’s mouth. Dentist: I just think of it as having my hands in their wallet.
Patient to Doctor: Aapne nurse bahut achhi rakhi hai uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gaya. Doctor: Jaanta hu, thappad ki awaaz yahan tak aa rahi thi ..
Senior doctor, junior doctor se: ward no. 12 mein behosh pade patient ki kya report hai? Junior doctor: sir uska to maine post mortem kar diya.