Computer Jokes To Crack You Up
Computer jokes that is sure to be your perfect dose of technology and computing humor. A hilarious take on technology, hardware, software, Internet and so much more, your laughter cells shall be pampered like never before.
1. Someone on his status “Sleeping” since 3 Days! He’s Probably dead.
2. Someone is “Driving” since 5 days! I guess he reached Dubai!
3. Someone’s status is “Happy” since 1 Month. Living in Paradise?
4. Someone is always ‘Available’. How free Are you?
A software expert claims: My software never has bugs — it just develops random features.
Apple Inc. has developed a new high tech toilet. The company is torn between two names for the new device: Either the iPood, or the iPeed.
Bachelor to computer: I want a companion who is small and cute, loves water sports, and enjoys group activities.
Computer: Marry a penguin.
Brahma: System installer
Vishnu: System operator
Shiva: System programmer
Narad: Data Transmitter
Computers can never replace humans. They may become capable of artificial intelligence, but they will never master real stupidity.
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
Congratulations… iPhone 6 launched…
The best feature of iPhone 6 is that if you hold it upside down it becomes iPhone 9.
Customer to Tech Support: It says, hit any key and when I do that nothing happens.
Tech Support: What key did you hit?
Customer replied: Well, first I tried my car key and just now my office key.
Help-desk guy speaking to a lady user …
Help-desk : Double click on “My Computer”.
Lady : I can’t see your computer..
Help-desk : No .. Click on “My Computer” on your computer.
Lady : How the hell can I click on your computer from my computer?
Help-desk: There is an icon labelled “My Computer” on your computer .. double click on it.
Lady : What the hell is your computer doing on my computer?
How computer language changes the lingo – An application was for employment; a program was a TV show; a cursor used profanity; a keyboard was a piano.
Memory was something you lost with age; a CD was a bank account; a hard drive was a long road trip.
A web was a spider’s home, and a virus was the flu!
How do you know you are spending too much time at home on Internet?
Your spouse emails you saying dinner is ready and uses the address
Q. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. None. That’s a hardware issue.
Q: Why was the computer so cold?
A: Because it forgot to shut its window
Tech Support: I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.
Tech Support: Did you get a pop-up menu? Customer: No.
Tech Support: Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?
Tech Support: Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?
Customer: Sure, you told me to write ‘click’ and I wrote click.
The attention span of a computer is as long as its electrical cord.
The businessperson told a nervous client to think of the computer match up service simply as “dater-processing”
To err is human; but to really mess things up requires a computer.
What does a baby computer call his father?
What happened when the computer fell on the floor?
It slipped a disk.
What is a computer virus?
A terminal illness.
What is a computer`s first sign of old age?
Loss of memory.
Why was there a bug in the computer?
It was looking for a byte to eat.
Woman in curtain store: I would like curtains the size of my computer screen. Shopkeeper: Why the size of computer screen? Woman: Because I’ve got windows!